So today my post begins with OY DA! :)
January alone was full of learning, challenges, and hopes fulfilled. And 12 months have passed us since my move to "Narnia". To remember and share months of life here is an overwhelming thing to attempt but I will take a few threads and unravel them for your information and (hopefully) benefit!
The Valley
The struggle to "make it" here with my team and in the "Narnian" culture was ominous looking before I even crossed the pond. What was in store was exponentially more shocking. Or should I say "distressing"? The words "culture shock" seem to suggest a sudden zaps that disappears in a moment, like lightning. But after walking through the shock, (distress, trauma, what have you) of re-finding out how to live and relate, I feel like "culture distress" is a more fitting term.
Before I could regain "my bearings" again the enemy, the darkness here, my human error, etc. reacted and deep deception about Papa G, myself, others snuck into my life. The fight to re-claim myself took weeks and weeks of struggle with a few timely gracious brothers and sisters, but THANKS BE TO G-D! I was restored and have a new capacity to create, to give, to pr-y and stand with others who feel at the end of their rope. He's not intimidated by the storms that happen within the human heart. And when we feel so so SO alone, remember the fact that HE HASN'T FORSAKEN YOU. And that there's a whole lot on the line, and your soul's well-being, and my soul's well-being ARE His department.
Earlier this month a woman returned to "Narnia". She first met me months ago and had not seen me since I recovered. The first thing she said to me was, "You're still here!? IT'S A MIRACLE!" I was a little insulted at first, "Did I seem like a goner?" I almost asked, wanting to defend my performance, but I stopped myself and realized it's not about me, "YEAH! It IS a miracle!" I agreed and she kept exclaiming more praise to Him. :) I still don't have a clear understanding about why He allowed me to walk such a deep valley for weeks here, but I know He's glorifying Himself, and I'm happy (now) just to know this.
Himself
Portions of the word of G-d are easy to retrieve from memory, but lately I am seeing and learning like never before. It's really great to see Him speak and instruct me from passages I've read over before, without my heart being impacted, and now I begin to meditate on the principles, truth, and application before I'm even conscious of doing so. It's like when you see someone yawn and you feel the sensation inside you to yawn yourself, without even consciously choosing to yawn right now. (Anyone else feel a yawn coming on?) My point is that He's drawing me into His precepts like I've never been drawn before. Specifically 1 Samuel. First Samuel has always ever been among the portions I force myself to read in the "Through the bible in a year" listing. But now I'm seeing much about G-d being revealed in Isra-l's story. It's fantastic! Perhaps my struggle against what He was doing by putting me in a valley last year has given me new eyes for passages like 1 Samuel...
Roof over my head
A few months into my time here I moved from one apartment to another. I left the country on 4 occasions, and I have one more "visa trip" to make in the next few weeks. Being displaced, not knowing where you will sleep in the country you reside in, or the next country over, I've found myself "F.I.N.E." on more occasions than I'd like to admit. "FINE" = Freaked Out, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional. How will I find the Embassy there? Will they try to extort money from me? Is is safe for me to travel alone? Will there be a vacancy in the guest house? Will I see my luggage again? Did I bring enough copies of the right documents? Is this taxi driver sober? Will I see "Narnia" again? Have the laws changed again? Will I have to apply from the States? What's the meaning of all this red tape! How will I pay for this?! What if I get stranded without lodging, internet or a cell phone with a sim card for that country? This is too much!!!!!!!!
Of course, seeing as how I'm writing this in retrospect, from "Narnia", everything fell into place for me to safely (though not comfortably) perform the mandatory tasks in the closest legal locations. Papa G made a way for me, I might have run out of finger nail to bite in the process, but I'm here with my hand to the plow, by His grace.
The End
This semester has special significance because it marks the end of my time here. Originally I was assigned with this team who would need me for two years. But things have changed. My team is working in conjunction with a college. To accommodate the academic schedule set for the students, this project was shortened. We leave Narnia on April 22nd and 23rd. I just bought a ticket to fly into SFO on the 22nd. It's a bitter sweet thing to consider. In just about 80 days I'll be in my mother land. Where police don't pull you over for bribe money...Where car horns don't sound like spaceships...Where my friends jaws don't drop when I mention that I know how to drive a car... Where grocery stores don't stock their shelves with expired food. Where men don't offer their seat in BART for a lady who boards the crowded train car (I'll miss that!).
"California, here I come"
San Jose will be my first stop. I do hope that I will be able to see you face to face again.
After spending a few weeks in SJ, my parents and I will go to Kansas City to welcome my sister' second child into our family! She is due in Late May/Early June.
After spending some time there I'd like head up to Minnesota to touch base with my "company" (that I work with here). In the fall the 8 students on my team will graduate from the college program.
What's Next?
I'll save that for a later blog entry. This one is LONG! Sorry for the tidal wave of information in this one. I'll be better about correspondence now!
THANK YOU FOR YOUR FAITHFUL SUPPORT AND PRA-ERS!
TAKE CARE!
In Him,
Yvonne
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